How to Make a Memory Jar

“Be sure you’re sharing with someone. Then, let them speak. this is how you begin to find the good memories.”

Sometimes, it’s difficult to find the “good memories” after losing a child. Your mind is filled with your loss and the very thought of your child can bring you to tears.

Feel free to use this Memory Jar craft as a way to bridge the gap between your hurt and the sweet memories of your child. It’s as easy as 1, 2, 3!

Step 1: Reach Out!

Your first step in creating your memory jar is to contact friends and family and ask for memories. This can be a scary step, but it’s the first stepping stone to building the bridge.

Often, friends tend to step away after a major loss. They’re unsure of what to do or say. They feel uncomfortable, and they don’t want to make you hurt more than you already do. You can counteract that by giving them permission to talk about your child.

Go ahead, ask them for a memory. Let them know what it means to you. Reach out by text, social media, Messenger, or even a brief phone call if you feel up to it. If you’re unsure of who to ask think about all the different circles, both, you AND your child belonged to, and make a list. Now, begin.

Having difficulty finding the good memories of your child? Click here to read a post you may find helpful.

Step Two: Print & Cut.

There’s not much to this step. This is the easy part! Download this free memory jar activity below. Print, read the instructions, and begin cutting out your memory cards. It’s that easy!

Step 3: Write away.

Read through each memory you receive. Know that this may be hard. It may be harder than you think. Feel free to put it aside, take a break, and come back again later.

On the other hand, you may experience the most laughter you’ve experienced in weeks. You never know unless you give it a try. One thing’s for sure. Your child deserves to be remembered, and friends and family need to know it’s okay to talk about and remember your kiddo.

Place your memory jar on a shelf, like the one above, so that it will be seen by all and become a beautiful conversation piece. Slowly, you’ll begin to find “good memories” just far enough away for your smile. One day, you may even be able to place a picture by the jar of funny, sincere, and thoughtful memories. Perhaps, you may even smile.

Please know that you may not be ready for this activity and that’s okay. Believe me, I understand. You may not even be able to conceive the idea of doing this until your the third year after your child’s death. Grief is strange.

Please do not force yourself into doing something you’re simply not ready for yet. This walk involves pain, that won’t go way by pushing yourself to do things you think you should be able to do.

But, when you’re ready. When you’re tired of being stuck in your head, when you’re ready to remember the good… this is a wonderful place to begin. Enjoy.